I’m back… again!

Hello my dear readers and friends! I know it’s been quite some time since I’ve written, and I’m sorry. I was not well, and had to take time to at least wrap my head around things surrounding my health.

Im-Back

On August 19, 2014 I sent my sweet baby boy to Kindergarten!!! He’s such a big boy now! He tells me that he is, and loves “big boy” school. He started school the day after I was released from the hospital for the picc line infection. I refused to miss his first day of school!! Yes, I’m a proud mama!!!

First Day of Kindergarten!
First Day of Kindergarten!
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My baby boy and I

In September my cardiologist in Virginia had another one placed, my doctor in Florida removed it feeling it was a serious risk. At that point I was so overwhelmed and angry that my neuro would no longer order the saline, that I was ok with it. I started physical therapy to help with my strength, it helped slightly, but mainly left me exhausted and in pain. I sprained my MCLs at the end of August, which required me to wear two knee braces, the sprains were so severe I have to wear these braces ALL THE TIME! I hated them, and didn’t really wear them. Bad girl, I know! this led to bursitis around my knee and required me to get the corticosteroids in my knees. Unfortunately I had to get it in my SI joint as well due to major issues there. Such is life! lol  I also had an Echo done, and it showed an enlarged heart, as well as mitral, tricuspid, and pulmonic regurgitation. My cardio in Virginia is keeping it monitored very closely.

October brought it’s own set of issues, as well as fun Halloween time!! I didn’t do so well in school because I wasn’t feeling so well and couldn’t keep up with the course work. It’s awful, but it’s not exactly a shocking development! My son decided to be Flash for Halloween, which meant I had to be Batgirl…… Oh yes, I’m THAT mom! lol We went trick or treating with friends, and had an amazing time.  Which makes it all worth it!!

November brought some difficulties with me getting around and keeping my energy up, but I was ok. Thanksgiving sucked. I unfortunately had full body tremors and was passing out… again a wonderful holiday ruined by my health. I cried, and had to be carried to my couch, and to the bathroom. Dysautonomia, you suck! But dinner was yummy!! I also had the Mirena IUD placed.. boy was that painful!

December is when things fell apart. I started having major pre syncope, and passing out. I became unable to keep my blood pressure up. It crashed more often than not. Eating became a bigger challenge. My mom flew down and drove us to her house in Tennessee. I basically slept the entire way. I couldn’t rally do anything else.

January, my life crashed. I could no longer control my blood pressure, and was constantly dizzy. My energy was non existent. I slept nearly all the time. And I still wasn’t really eating. What I did eat, didn’t stay in me for long. My neuro here in Florida didn’t know what to do with me. She pretty much threw her hands up and told me that I DID NOT have dysautonomia. Which I found interesting because TWO other hospitals confirmed the diagnosis, and why didn’t she say anything in the last TWO year she was treating me for it?!  I found a neuro in Tampa that knows dysautonomia. I saw him at the end of January, and he ordered all new tests.  My sister drove me to my appointments, and for that i’m so grateful. My appointment for testing was last week. The tests confirmed that I do indeed have dysautonomia. He also said that my neuropathy is so severe in my legs that it’s affecting the blood flow to my feet, which is why they’re always freezing cold. He decided not to even try the Florinef or midodrine again as I had such bad reactions to them… He decided to go straight to IV saline… which means, another IV, which means a picc line or a port. I’m opting for the port. He has hope that this will help tremendously. I know it will help some.  This month has been incredibly difficult as I have no energy, and no appetite. I’m rarely hungry and when I am hungry I barely eat anything. My dizziness is so bad. My mirena has cause extreme pain. Today I learned that I have several ovarian cysts and pelvic fluid. The doctor ordered a CT scan, which is being done Friday. I’m hoping this is nothing major. I’m hoping it’s not Endometriosis rearing it’s ugly head again. I’m hoping for so many things.

I know at times we all feel helpless, angry, grieving, depressed. We must not let these feelings consume us. I know it’d be easy to let them, but we need to remember our fight, our inner strength. We’ve made it this far, we can make it even farther and face all  that comes toward us. Remember you are loved, you are worth it, and you are beautiful and amazing, but most of all remember you are not alone in this fight!! We’re all warriors, we’re all a family!

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Hospital, Smoshpital

Hello all!! It’s been a bumpy few weeks, but i’m still standing! (Barely). First things first… My little boy started kindergarten Monday!! Such a bittersweet moment!! He’s growing up so fast! I may have shed a few tears! He’s my baby boy! 🙂

Mathew's First Day of Kindergarten 8.18.14
Mathew’s First Day of Kindergarten 8.18.14

I’ve been trying to stay ahead of my fibro and POTS flares, but not fortunate enough to do it. On Saturday, I became very ill very quickly. Around 11am I had a small low grade fever, by 6 pm, I had started vomiting, at 9pm my temperate had reached 103.9, and I was still vomiting.. I headed to the hospital. My PICC line was removed, and heavy duty antibiotics, Zosyn and Vancomycin were started. I was admitted before I even walked into the ER, thanks to my wonderful primary care doctor.  I still had a fever at 4am! Luckily it broke, and between that and the antibiotics, I slowly became better. I was still nauseous, but ginger ale and crackers helped. My amazing friend Amanda brought me oatmeal for breakfast! It was so yummy and just what my tummy needed!! I was luckily released later Sunday night!

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What a weekend!! I’m so glad i’m alright, the doctors are still trying to figure out what caused the fever and such. It was so scary.

On a positive note, I started my fall semester today, and hopeful it’ll be the best one yet!!

Being chronically ill can lead to feeling lonely or depressed. Surround yourself with loving friends and family. Remember you are a wonderful person, and deserve to be happy! Just because we’re sick doesn’t mean we’re less deserving!!

Stay sweet my readers!! Until next time!!

You found what, where?

 

now what

I was scheduled for an MRI and an appointment with an Electrophysiologist at Johns Hopkins on November 25.  This C-Spine MRI was important. They were checking for spinal lesions for MS. I arrived in Washington DC, Sunday night after a 2 hour delay due to a mechanical problem with my plane leaving Chicago. I was exhausted by the time I got in, as my flight was at 8am that morning. I had trouble in security at FLL, there were no female TSA officers on the floor to do a pat down, as I have a pacemaker and unable to go through metal detectors, so I waited, sitting on the floor for 20 minutes. I thought this was unacceptable.

 Once I got to DC, I was so tired I fell asleep pretty much as soon as I got to my hotel. The next morning, I was surprised with a trip through the capitol on the way to Baltimore to see the monuments. 🙂 Once arriving at Johns Hopkins we were prepared for the long day ahead. First was my MRI. Then my appt with my EP. Everything went well during the MRI. So I was off to see my electrophysiologist. He was apparently on vacation, but made arrangements to come in and see me. We went over everything. I show signs of pots, and NCS, but at intermittent times. I still have Inappropriate Sinus Tachycardia. We agreed to continue monitoring everything. If I worsen, then we will seek medication or if necessary another surgery.  We also discussed the possibility of MS, and other possibilities that could be causing my symptoms. He wanted to meet with a Rheumatologist to get their thoughts on it. And possibly schedule a phone consult.  I’m excited I have him in my corner!  Before I left the hospital I was able to get a copy of my MRI disc, and request my report be emailed to me. 

The next morning the MRI report was in my inbox. I read it and cried.  There is Disc Dessication from C3-C7, there is also a hemangioma on my C4.  Degenerative Disc Disease and a benign tumor..not what I was expecting..AT ALL!!! But you know what??!! It’s ok. I’m strong enough.I have been in horrible pain for months in regards to my neck and back. Since I got back from Johns Hopkins the day before Thanksgiving, I’ve been basically bedridden. So, today I went to see and orthopedist that specializes in neck, and spine. And again, another shock.  Today I learned I have Scoliosis, and A deformity of my femur in my hip socket, also there is a lesion on my left hip bone. He ordered CT Scans immediately.  He seemed upset to learn that I’ve had x-rays recently by my other doctor and nothing was said or done. I’m still trying to remain positive.  It’s all I can do. I refuse to let the darkness or whatever this disease is wins. I’m scheduled for CT scans Friday, and to see him immediately afterwards.  My questions is this, how was any of this missed?? Or wasn’t it???  My family is trying to be supportive, but my dad is becoming increasingly frustrated and unpleasant. SO i’ve decided to stop telling him about any of it. If the scoliosis is as severe as my ortho fears, i’ll need surgery to help me, also surgery to help fix my hip.  My dad informed me tonight that he has a curved spine, and that my uncle has scoliosis. He blames it on the way I walk. There is no way walking this way for barely a year could cause damage that way my back is now. The doctor said it’d take years.  

So now we wait to find out how severe the curve is, what the lesion is, and we have to check bone density as well. One thing I do know. My friends, and family have been incredibly supportive. They’ve shown me such love and support throughout this past year and I’m so grateful.

family and friends